Linked - Connected For Sale
I see LinkedIn as a networking platform - that's why I want people to network and connect with me there. I want to engage in authentic connection and foster meaningful relationships. Not to be sold to.
"I'm glad we're connected now, can I sell you my product?" Not a day goes by that I don't receive messages via LinkedIn that could all be summed up like this.
I know a little about advertising psychology, a little more about storytelling, and one thing I know for sure: that's not the way to build trust with potential business partners, customers, or just fellow human beings.
Unsolicited sales messages working with FOMO, feelings of guilt, pressure build-up, passive-aggressive or purely aggressive attempts at manipulation get deleted immediately without exception.
In this example the artificial pressure build-up starts right in the subject line:
"Urgent, appointment pending!"
Oh yeah? I don't think so, I don't even know you, there is certainly nothing urgent between us.
Entitled Attention Deficit Syndrome
I also find it interesting that many actually believe they are entitled to my attention or even a response despite such obviously idiotic behavior and think it gets better the more they repeat the nonsense:
"I've already written you 5 messages, I thought my offer should interest you?!"
You could add to the message:
"It didn't occur to me to look further into what you actually do, but I just assume you need me. And yes, I don't care that I have now offered you your own expertise 5 times."
That's like Ottakringer (well-known Austrian beer brand) salespeople writing aggressive messages to Schwechater (another well-known Austrian beer brand) offering them their beer and then getting offended when the competitor doesn't bite.
What were they expecting?
A bulk order?
The fifth and final message I got from this particular individuum ended with the desperate question, "Should I just give it up?!"
I didn't respond to so much despair, but I do occasionally fire back at other, all-too-big nonsense now.
“First, let me tell you about ME!”
The first occasion for me to fire back was a message starting like this:
"Let me tell you about me first. I now have 5 years of storytelling experience and can teach you to tell good stories too."
That's great, I thought, after 20+ years in storytelling, a professional with 5(!) years of experience is now offering to teach me.
"I'm glad you got back to me, I've been waiting for your message for years," was not what I replied to him.
Instead, I gave him a little pro-tip: "If you're not Apple, Microsoft, Google and the like, your story as an entry point won't interest potential customers at all", and offered him to join one of my strategic communication seminars to deepen the topic.
He was quite perplexed.
“You have a problem!”
One of my favorite no-goes is also starting with "Do you also have this and that problem?"
Assuming that someone you don't know at all has a particular problem is really a shotgun blast into the blue.
But that's not the only irritating thing about it.
The assumption that the other person has a problem immediately creates a defensive posture - even or especially if it is true. And this means that the opportunity to build up a basis of trust is thoroughly wasted right from the start.
The Guilt Trap
Creating guilt with "We connected 3-days ago, and you still haven't responded to my sales-only email" is just as annoying a manipulation attempt as the sympathy ploy à la "Please give me a second of your time and answer why you haven't responded to me. Is it answer one, two or three?"
I see what you are trying to do there and none of this works with me at all.
Maybe I'll set up a standard message for such cases in the future:
"I agreed to let you connect with me and you immediately abused that to send me unsolicited sales messages. Do you really think that's the start of a trusting business relationship? And do you really think that's how networking works?"